March 2024 Monthly Summary

In March, I moved, finished chapter 1 of my thesis, received a lot of material support, and rested. I yielded to God’s timings with the moving timeline and waited for him to shift things.

My experience of Lent and the Resurrection this year felt continuous and fluid rather than the discrete daily celebrations of Holy Week. I was surprised by how quickly I fell back into my rhythm after moving. I’m still appreciating the mystery of how God keeps providing.

The Mantle of the Favored Child

This March was full of palpable momentum. There was such a clear sense of “we are steering in a new direction”.

The night leading into Easter Sunday (3/31), the Lord gave me a dream that honored the journey we’ve taken together over the last 5 years. He acknowledged the lifestyle of dependence that has been teaching me and honored my yieldedness. Once again, he rearticulated the identity of a “Favored Child” he gave me in 2022. At that time, we went traveling together to see places he would have me establish ministry partnerships in later. Before I had done anything, it was important to him for me just to receive.

At the end of the dream, he promised that because I had chosen dependence, this identity would become a new mantle for others to internalize through me. Both children and adults would receive disproportionate, even offensive favor as a result of their yieldedness and intimacy with God.

As I woke up, I had some big questions. I recognized that this mantle related to material provision, and wanted to make sure that there was no hint of prosperity gospel in how I interpreted it. I asked God to show me how it related to scripture. He led me to Matthew 3:17 and how God spoke favor and blessing over Jesus’s life and ministry. I also remembered Matthew 17:27, of how Jesus pulled a coin from the mouth of a fish to pay his tax and Peter’s. From this place of greater provision certainty, I’ve been starting to think about who I would like to see recompensed. In prayer, I’m starting to try to leverage that favor in the direction of the people I care about. When I pray for specific people and situations, it feels like warmth or fire at the center of my chest, and emotive intercession that flows from a place of deep solidarity.

Learning How to Receive

By the time I had this dream, the Lord had been pouring out blessings all month. People donated their time and energy to help me move. From strangers, I received an air conditioner, a TV, a printer, a step, stool, and a car. I ultimately gave the car back because I sensed it wasn’t the right vehicle, but I was so touched that my friends remembered me. On social media, I was chosen by random number generators to receive these items. Since it was a lottery, his blessing over me steered the results in my favor, like the story of Jacob’s wealth growing through the spotted sheep in Genesis 30. The favor on me to receive these gifts started to become so frequent that it became a testimony to my friends at work about the goodness of God.

If that were not enough, there was blessing enough to go around! We found out several days ago that every worker at our retail company except the highest managers would receive a salary increase of $2/hr. While it may not seem significant to some, this change is enormous for hourly employees who are just scraping by. According to my boss, no one saw it coming, not even the regional manager. We were all rejoicing like children!

I’m beyond thrilled that my friends and I get to receive together! It’s so much more fun as a team.

Celebration and Rest

At the time God started doing these provision miracles, he had brought me into a ridiculous place of peace. Moving into a studio again gave me the room I needed for the right boundaries and rest. As these things have happened, it hasn’t been a surprise, but more of a celebration. I have known all along that at some point, the favor I’ve experienced from him over the last year would hit a point where it became much more visible. As he begins to send some early acceleration, I want to have as much time and space to worship in private. I want to preserve the depth of the relationship I have with him and don’t want the appearance of success to get in the way. I already knew that he had covenanted to me, and was committed to supporting me, growing me, and helping me get to the places we need to go. Now that others are starting to realize that, I still want privacy and space to focus on him. The challenge of the moment is saving that space for him alone as more opportunities and people get added to the mix…Both the volume and complexity of my responsibilities are rising. The only way forward is with Jesus.

General Monthly Rhythms of Responding to God

I write these Monthly Summaries because I want to track how I’ve grown with God. The practice of summarizing the many ways he moves each month engages my heart to worship and gives me simple ways to synthesize everything that happened to friends. I’ve written these summaries since October 2019! Since that time, a pattern has emerged in the shape of my process each month.

  • Week 1: Detecting and processing fresh grace for new ways God wants to send growth, breakthrough, or healing that month
  • Weeks 2-3: Doing the majority of the internal work, productive wrestling, and deep engagement
  • Week 4: Noticing that some things have really changed since the beginning of the month, recognizing questions I still have, and next pieces that feel confusing

This pattern holds true and allows me to close out each month well. It’s become an “internal work” exercise regime. It’s my responsibility to reflect on what God is doing in and around me each month. It’s my personality and specific design to store those things in detail. It’s my challenge to synthesize and connect everything in a way that helps others receive my story as an invitation for them to participate in the larger story of what he’s doing locally, regionally, and globally in this season.

Worship

Music

Early March – Psalm 27, Jonathan Ogden

Middle March – Freedom, Jesus Culture

End of March – You can Just Rest, Jenn Johnson

Verses

  • Psalm 72, thinking about the theme of nobility who use their power well
  • Psalm 27, remembering his specific promises to me

Names of God

Each month, I give God a name that aligns with scripture and how he revealed himself to me that month. This month, I spent the majority of time knowing him as,

  • “God who Remembers”

Media

This month kept me too busy for most movies and books! Instead, made an active effort to adapt to the pace of life, spending more of my free time outside and sitting quietly.

Prayer Requests

  • To not lose intimacy with God as the pace of life picks up and the blessings become more obvious
  • To remain in his timings when it comes to career and school, building momentum for writing by doing the next right thing at a time
  • The capacity to engage even more deeply in my thesis and the grace to adapt to the degree of challenge this process requires

February 2024 Monthly Summary

As the Mist Clears, a New Day is Inevitable

Link to image
https://www.adorama.com/alc/wp-content/uploads/2022/06/daniel-mirlea-dfuA04fz9yM-unsplash-1.jpg

One day last month, the Lord spoke into what the process of changing seasons would look like not just for me personally, but for the Church.

I woke up to the aroma of fresh hyacinth and to pink sunlight streaming through the windows. Yet when I got out of bed and got dressed to meet the day, there was nothing but early morning mist. Eventually, the mist burnt off as the sun rose higher and higher into the sky, revealing a new dawn.

The mist is temporary, but the new day is certain. The more Jesus lifts himself up and puts his glory on display, the more obvious it will be that his grace is over new methods, new styles of leadership, and new understandings of what it means to be the Church.

Rather than doubting what you’ve heard or seen, now is the time to hold fast, nestle up close to God, and get his perspective. We are crossing into a new epoch, and glimpses of eternal strategy are available for people who are willing to meet him in the high places.

Altered Perspective

Those people who choose to meet God in a higher place will inevitably come away more insulated during shaking and more clear about what battles they should and should not be fighting. This is still a time of refining and receiving, and as individual and collective perspectives shift, what we will be building late this year will look much different than the approach we might take now if we move too quickly.

There is still time to receive whatever you lack. In need of joy? Take delight in God. Not sure why those things didn’t work out? Ask him to show you how he positioned you to receive more and better. Unsure where you are meant to be relationally investing? Ask him to show you where to find your spiritual food and places of belonging. Aware that the clothes from a previous season no longer fit? Draw near and he will help change your garments.

There will be plenty of time for activity and movement later on. As for right now, I plan on just delighting in being with the Lord as he keeps sharing how some of these changes look from his point of view. It’s like standing in a high lookout place above the treeline. The peace that comes from dwelling in that place has the effect of grounding me in ways that I didn’t know I needed–like lashing down train tracks with iron bolts. I’m sure I will need this degree of deep stability later on as things start to move. In the meantime, it feels like being progressively well-insulated.

Ministry Developments

  • Most High: God giving me glimpses of long-term strategy, epoch change, and how the pieces fit together for decades. Having my perspective on small things change as a result of seeing the bigger picture. Greater capacity to remain the head and not the tail, breakthroughs with logistical hurdles to change as a result of not being intimidated and resting in the Lord. Comprehensively greater yielded-ness and clarity.
  • Most Deep: Working with Generations of the Nations to intercede over regions before we start building there later on. Investing in a region as a team building on layers of intercession month by month as the Lord leads.
  • Most Joyful: Spending quality time with a local friend who has a similar calling to China, missions, and the education sector
  • Most Loved: Moments where God is increasing the quality of my provision and doting on me. Being surrounded by amazing people and recently, better resources than I would have anticipated.
  • Biggest Stretch: Finishing chapter 1 of my doctoral thesis! So many layers to synthesize. Doing it right and not too quickly! Excited to see the methodology come to life after I graduate and in the coming years.
  • Most Mysterious: Retracing a history of mysticism and revival through France, Germany, and Scandinavia as God consolidates Europe to be sent

Worship

Music

Verses

  • John 15-16
  • The Ascension
  • Psalm 101

Names of God

Each month, I give God a name that aligns with scripture and how he revealed himself to me that month. This month, I spent the majority of time knowing him as,

“God who Holds All Things Together”

Isaiah 41:17-20,

“The poor and needy search for water,
    but there is none;
    their tongues are parched with thirst.
But I the Lord will answer them;
    I, the God of Israel, will not forsake them.
18 I will make rivers flow on barren heights,
    and springs within the valleys.
I will turn the desert into pools of water,
    and the parched ground into springs.
19 I will put in the desert
    the cedar and the acacia, the myrtle and the olive.
I will set junipers in the wasteland,
    the fir and the cypress together,
20 so that people may see and know,
    may consider and understand,
that the hand of the Lord has done this,
    that the Holy One of Israel has created it.

Isaiah 41:25-29

“I have stirred up one from the north, and he comes—
    one from the rising sun who calls on my name.
He treads on rulers as if they were mortar,
    as if he were a potter treading the clay.
26 Who told of this from the beginning, so we could know,
    or beforehand, so we could say, ‘He was right’?
No one told of this,
    no one foretold it,
    no one heard any words from you.
27 I was the first to tell Zion, ‘Look, here they are!’
    I gave to Jerusalem a messenger of good news.
28 I look but there is no one—
    no one among the gods to give counsel,
    no one to give answer when I ask them.
29 See, they are all false!
    Their deeds amount to nothing;
    their images are but wind and confusion.

The Sovereign Lord is my strength;
    he makes my feet like the feet of a deer,
    he enables me to tread on the heights.

Hab 3:19

Media

Books

The Rhineland Mystics: Writings of Meister Eckhart, Johannes Tauler, and Jan Van Ruusbroec and Selections from the Theologia Germanica and the Book of Spiritual Poverty translated by Oliver Davies

As my Generations of the Nations group dives deeper into declaring what God is doing in Germany, I’m taking the time to understand more of the Rhineland’s history of mysticism. Though I studied Meister Eckhart and Jan Van Ruusbroec for seminary last summer, I was most impressed by the practical, clear teachings of Johannes Tauler. While it can be difficult to find good translations for his works, they are really something special. Here are a few of his quotes from the book!

Movies

Inn of the Sixth Happiness (1968)

Prayer Requests

  • To remain focused on what God is doing eternally and within this epoch rather than fixating on lesser things
  • Ease of logistics with the transitions I need to make this season, while still keeping my eyes on him

January 2024 Monthly Summary

Comfort in the Heights

Last August, I moved to a house near Greenlake to be closer to my church. The peacefulness of the lake reflected water and washing imagery that squared with dreams about both what God has been doing in Seattle and in my own life. When I met with the Lord in the mornings, I would slowly walk around the lake in one of two directions. When I needed to personally process something, I would walk to the left, in the direction of many birds. On those days, I’d sit near the still benches, watch the ducks, and move slowly. When I needed to process or pray for something for my church, region, or the nations, I’d walk faster and to the right. On those days, I would often end up climbing into in a life-guard’s chair and thinking about what it means to meet with God in the heights.

As I have walked these paths the last six months, I’ve taken on various projects and come to a place of greater integration. I started to notice in January that it no longer mattered what direction I walked, because I was able to process what I needed to process outside of those times. What began to matter most was a sense of movement and the freedom that I had found with God in the high places. Instead of feeling like my freedom was context-dependent, I felt that I was free to soar in the spirit regardless.

At the same time, greater evidence of the need to move became impossible to ignore. In my case, that movement means beginning the process of changing housing so that I can be in a more settled and insulated place for the year ahead. Having right boundaries and the capacity to meet with God without disruptions is so critical in this year of continued shaking. As we continue to meet with God, he is teaching communities how to soar above the noise and call atmospheres into alignment with Heaven. The Church must practice stewarding the authority it has been given as we enter into a period of increasing international influence. Locally and internationally, changes aren’t happening *to* us but *for* us.

Free to Move

This month, I contemplated these things as I was getting ready to spend time with God in the library. I wanted to soak in the *rare* winter Seattle sunlight but was having trouble finding a bench that was sunny enough. Half joking, I asked the Lord to redirect the sun so I could still enjoy it. He directed me to a patio table in a high place, tucked away from foot traffic. Once I sat down, the angle of the sun shifted. Glinting off the window panes from the nearby building, the reflection provided plenty of light.In that moment, I really felt the Lord reassuring me that if I made a step into the unknown, he would provide for me.

“Will you meet me in the Unknown?”

In this year of stepping bravely into the unknown, some of us are at a crossroads and have to choose to take the next right step. It’s a choice that you may logically understand the need to take, but aren’t all that thrilled about. In processing this season, there is the temptation to either shut down and not process emotions that come from directional changes, or make such a big deal of them that we are unable to move.

There is freedom in telling God what we need, and security in that he knows what we need already. For those who are willing to step forward and upward, he will find ways of directing provision to you if you are willing to acknowledge that staying in the same place is no longer an option. His methods and plans are higher (Isaiah 55:8-9).

Trust that if he’s calling you to step forward, there will be provision for the move. His loving kindness can do much more than redirect the sunlight, he can move entire mountains for our sake.

Ministry Developments

  • This month, I spent 3-4 sessions a week in the library writing Chapter 1 of my thesis. God gave me clarity to transition the chapter design from small to large context (ie, one ministry, Seattle, the Pacific Northwest, the US, and the globe) to deeply describing my ministry context and a problem-solution framing
  • Out of the blue, God inspired a friend who is trained in copy-editing to edit my chapters. In the summer, I had told him, “I don’t know if I need a copyeditor, but if I do, please bring one.” This was a great reminder of how God provides for us specifically based on the needs of our season.
  • 3 new people became interested in joining Generations of the Nations and will be attending our February meeting.
  • God encouraged me that if I make my way to the high place, he will form a table of people around me. I believe that this image relates to how God is challenging communities to meet with him in collective prayer and intercession. As a result, the strategies of I have adapted the strategies of Generations of the Nations and how I pray with friends locally to suit this season. I strongly believe that prior to building new expressions of ministry, we must collectively focus on intercession so that new expressions can be birthed in purity and wholeness.
  • Attending a retreat with my church’s youth ministry and leaders
  • Seeing even nonChristian friends encourage me to make a housing change. In encouraging me to trust my senses, they went out of their way to speak in my language using word choice related to spirituality. I was touched by their willingness to use my language, and it reminded me that in relationships where there is love and trust, code-switching is normal.

Worship

Music

Verses

  • Psalm 16
  • Psalm 101
  • The blessings in Deuteronomy 28, being the head and not the tail (Deut 28:13)

Names of God

Each month, I give God a name that aligns with scripture and how he revealed himself to me that month. This month, I spent the majority of time knowing him as,

“God, who Dwells on the Heights”

“Heaven is my throne,
    and the earth is my footstool.
Where is the house you will build for me?
    Where will my resting place be?
Has not my hand made all these things,
    and so they came into being?”
declares the Lord.

Isaiah 66:1

He alone is immortal and who lives in unapproachable light, whom no one has seen or can see. To him be honor and might forever. Amen.

1 Timothy 6:16

For the Lord has chosen Zion,
    he has desired it for his dwelling, saying,
14 “This is my resting place for ever and ever;
    here I will sit enthroned, for I have desired it.
15 I will bless her with abundant provisions;
    her poor I will satisfy with food.
16 I will clothe her priests with salvation,
    and her faithful people will ever sing for joy.

17 “Here I will make a horn[b] grow for David
    and set up a lamp for my anointed one.
18 I will clothe his enemies with shame,
    but his head will be adorned with a radiant crown.”

Psalm 132:13-18

The Lord is exalted, for he dwells on high;
    he will fill Zion with his justice and righteousness.
He will be the sure foundation for your times,
    a rich store of salvation and wisdom and knowledge;
    the fear of the Lord is the key to this treasure.

Isaiah 33:5-6

Media

Books

God Here and Now, Karl Barth (1964)

[On behalf of Christ] is the Church charged with this proclamation. And so it has no boast of its own. This message is as new and foreign and superior to the Church as it is to all the people to whom the Church is supposed to proclaim it (yes). The Church can only deliver it the way a postman delivers his mail; the Church is not asked what it thinks it is thereby starting, or what it makes of the message. The less it makes of it and the less it leaves on it its own fingerprints, the more it simply hands it on as it has received it–and so much the better. The Church is also not asked whether its own power, faith, skill, and knowledge are adequate for the transmitting of this message. It is required simply to use all that it is and as best it can, but it must put all this completely and without reservations in the service of this message. And the Church is not questioned about the visible or invisible, great or small success of its deeds. It is supposed to toss its seed about, only let it see to it that it is this seed, like the sower in the Gospel, in the holy thoughtlessness for which Goethe once found fault with this sower. Its way is shown to it. It only needs to go along with it. He who founded and sent it out, and continues to be found and send it out, bears its responsibility. Let it but go along that path. Let it but live in that commission. Surely the Church need not then worry about the coming day.

The Church exists by living for this commission. Thus, it does not exist as an end in itself. It has no line of retreat into a churchly subjectivity. It feels neither into preaching nor into the sacrament, neither into exegesis nor into dogmatics. It strikes forward when it preaches, and it strikes forward when it baptizes and celebrates the Lord’s Supper. Its exegesis is assault and its dogmatics is also assault, or else they are not worth the time and trouble they take, nor the expsnive paper on which they are written and printed. The Church does not escape into prayer either, but it prays in order to work. And for just that reason it will also not escape from prayer into all kinds of relief work or politics. The reason why it does not escape is that in no respect is it there for itself. It exists alone for the message of God’s free grace. It goes with it into the whole world; with it, and for its sake, to make it concrete and clear, then certainly also in the form of relief work and (let us hope, clever and bold) political decisions. It delivers the message as God’s message “to all people”. Therefore the Church itself is there for all people. 

Again, the Church is not asked whether or not the people accept it, or whether or not it deserves their confidence. It is not asked to account for their piety or their godlessness, for their orthodoxy or their idolatry, and therefore not even for the stand the people take with respect to the Church. It is not asked whether it might lose itself in being there for the people. It has no diplomacy or strategy to carry on with respect to them. “When Jesus saw the people, he was moved with pity for them; for they were tormented and exhausted like sheep without a shepherd” (Matthew 9:36). That is the only thing that counts and is interesting and urgent. The people are “just people”, as they have always and everywhere been. They are tormented and exhausted because, in their piety and godlessness, in their orthodoxy and idolatry, they have no shepherd and they go astray. The shepherd they lack is Jesus Himself, and therefore the message of God’s free grace. When Jesus saw these people, He was moved with pity for them. There, in His discipleship, is where the Church belongs. It is simply there for these people. Otherwise, it cannot be there for God. It cannot be the Church at all, except by repeating the great turning of God, to which Christians as well owe their existence, towards the trespassers and the lost, and thereby making the free grace of God visible. In this sense, the Church can the Church only as the people’s Church; and only as the Church for the people, and in the midst of the people can it be a confessing Church.

 Those to whom this message is addressed are simply the people, the quite ordinary people, with their serious and their childish concerns and needs; with their confused consciences, their dullness and illusions. Anything else besides just going to these people is certainly not the commission of the Church. If the Church does not love the message of free grace (if it stands apart from people with too many scruples, if it meets them with too many reproaches), if it is afraid of that message and is too pious and moralistic for the people, what is the Church then? Nothing, nothing at all!

Movies

Land (2021)

I loved how this movie told one woman’s story of choosing life over death despite tremendous loss. It also reminds me of how grief can be tied to physical places.

Prayer Requests

  • Grace, ease, provision, and logistical favor over every move I need to make this year

2023 Yearly Summary

As 2023 comes to a close, I cannot help but remember the many places Jesus carried me through. In this year of being doted on in hidden joy, I was formed by the places Jesus called me to meet him and the truths he revealed about his character.

As I met God in the garden, the Lord God planted me. I saw Jesus as a Tree of Life (John 15:1, Genesis 2:9) and meditated on his glory in new and deepening ways. I recognized him as the Gardener (John 20:15-16) who brings all things to fruition.

As I met Jesus in the depths (Psalm 36:6, Psalm 139:7-10) he taught me to make the unknown my refuge and delight in mystery. Out of a hidden place, he progressively made the way straight for the future (Isaiah 45:2, Mark 1:3). He began to lift a banner on my behalf, bringing me people and resources (Psalm 92:10-15). He provided direction month by month through revelation in dreams, natural signs and wonders, and prophesy.

As I met him in the new house he is building for the nations, he made my foundation his clarity and settled peace. He gave me rest and took the time to explain some elements of his blueprints. During shaking, he lifted me up with a higher perspective and taught me to glide in the Spirit rather than to wrestle (Psalm 104:3). Locally, he has been equipping me for war through training in declarations, knowing when to contend, and being refreshed in private (Matthew 14:23; Mark 6:46–47; John 6:15). More broadly, he has backed me in leadership, allowing Generations of the Nations to flourish despite shaking. He keeps holding everything together both near and far, now and in the future.

When I was afraid of the amount of growth required, he told me that he would carry me into maturity.

When I was unsure whether my weaknesses would cause things to fall apart, he said that he would use even my limits to establish my life and ministry.

When I saw loss, he spoke gain! He gave me eyes for eternity and sang over me. He honored my decision to surrender, continually encouraging me so that I could manage to go lower still. He taught me that I have my own inheritance and that he delights in lifting me up.

As a child, I remember sitting in the middle of a church service, longing to be lifted up by His Spirit in a tangible way. I remember wanting to interact with his Spirit more comprehensively, longing for some sign of his manifest presence. Now, his saving help is so close. And more than that, I am not afraid of being lifted up or noticed because my eyes are on him. He has blessed me as much as I can bear. He keeps strengthening my insides so that I can retain the volume of goodness he has planned for the future.

2024: Christ, the Dawn

In 2024, I believe that Jesus will be rising as the Sun over the nations. I believe we will see powerful moves of God in Southeast Asia, with adoration for Jesus bringing different religious traditions together.

I believe that Jesus will also be rising as the Sun over Seattle. I believe that he will reveal his glory to them through the Holy Spirit, giving them living water to sate their spiritual hunger and thirst. Many will awaken from their slumber and begin to encounter God’s heights and depths. As he glorifies himself, I believe he will also glorify humble people with him, because they have made room to receive. The purity of heart that he’s formed in people will cause them to see God. I am praying that God manifests the full range of his character so that the people will have every reason to receive. I hope that Christians in the region are willing to surrender and receive the range of what God plans to do. And I hope that nonChristians are open to letting their spirits carry them into something beyond what they could ask or imagine.

Prayers for 2024

Over 2024, I am praying specifically…

  • For God to do such a comprehensive work of integration. For God to integrate times and places, synchronously blessing my Seattle, United States context and the nations, streamlining present events and the future, to set us up for decades of fruit in ministry
  • That 2024 be a truly bridging and expanding year
  • That I will have practical help to learn how to fundraise and apply for nonprofit status for Generations of the Nations
  • That even more effectual doors open up for ministry and that God holds all the logistics together

December 2023 Monthly Summary

Hidden Joy

This December was a time to reflect on the tremendous amount of hidden joy I found in 2023. This has been a year where God tangibly doted on me and demonstrated that what I want really matters to him. He has committed to establishing and supporting my growth and has given me freedom from others’ expectations. He knows how to get me to the places he has planned, even when I have to be carried there by grace.

As I reconnected with various friends this month, it was a blessing to be able to only share specific details with the people I trust. There is a special portion that the Lord has given just to me, and I’m content to selectively share it.

“My own vineyard is mine to give…”

Song of Songs 8:2

In this year of secret joy, I’ve found how convenient it is to allow others to misunderstand. It frees me up to receive from the Lord, enjoy Jesus, nourish and protect the people I lead. It gives me time to enjoy the present, sift timings, sharpen strategy, and prepare for the future. It reminds me of how God intentionally shrouds himself with mystery when he considers it more comfortable or necessary than sharing.

“He made darkness his covering, his canopy around him— the dark rain clouds of the sky.”

Psalm 18:11

“Who has known the mind of the Lord? Or who has been his counselor?” “Who has ever given to God, that God should repay them?” For from him and through him and for him are all things. To him be the glory forever! Amen.

Romans 11:34-36

“God, the blessed and only Ruler, the King of kings and Lord of lords, 16 who alone is immortal and who lives in unapproachable light, whom no one has seen or can see. To him be honor and might forever. Amen.”

1 Timothy 6:15-16

There is both joy in both the revelation and the mystery, joy in both the staying and the leaving. May the Lord stretch us to encounter the heights and depths of this joy!

The Need for Complete Surrender

This month as I prepared to start thesis writing in January, I felt stuck. I needed both practical and spiritual help. God made me aware that the only way to move into ease was through a greater portion of surrender. God reassured me that if I was willing to receive support from a place of weakness, he would provide beyond my capacity. In December, he used my limits to put his strength on display.

God’s provision of help looked like:

  • Receiving unrequested prophetic ministry prayer to have a breakthrough in the writing process
  • Changing the structure of how Generations of the Nations stewards prophetic words
  • Receiving the gift of a staycation from a friend, resting in her apartment while she was out of town. Having silence and free time to hear from the Lord!
  • Receiving the gift of time to adventure with a friend and being on different land outside of Seattle
  • Receiving the expertise of an advisor who went through every relevant book related to her subject area in detail. Ultimately, she advised me to change the start point of my thesis outline, reducing the scope to something more manageable. Hours of labor were saved through her specific, clear advice.
  • A friend offered to create a website for Generations of the Nations so that I don’t have to do it on my own. Though I love techy projects, I accepted the help and recognized that I needed to let this one go.
  • Being able to pass on the raw curated prophetic words for Intergenerational ministry in Seattle rather than synthesize them elegantly. My Generations of the Nations received these layers several months ago, and I needed to trust that because I am sharing them with the right people and am actively engaged in supporting this ministry, it will be enough. I needed to accept that though my preference is to scribe elegantly synthesized words, these raw pieces must be enough for now.
  • Being able to resist restlessness and remain in the peace of God. More capacity to direct my body and soul to rest (Psalm 16, Psalm 42).

God’s promise to me has been that if I let him lead, he will multiply my time here in Seattle beyond what seemed possible in the specific window. He has so extravagantly doted on me this year that his promises are believable. He keeps demonstrating that he isn’t afraid of my limitations. Because he has chosen me, he will cause what I do to be successful regardless of me just being human. Because I’ve made my life about his business, he has taken up my concerns as his own. He delights to share!

As I took time to rest and receive from Heaven over the holidays, I was able to rest so deeply that I organically got bored and started to have energy for January. I’m excited for 2024! Lord, help me run with you in excellence and simply soar.

Ministry Developments

  • Personal refreshing over the holidays and grace to receive
  • Changing the name of the “Youth and Young Prophets Network” group I’ve been leading to “Generations of the Nations” so that the mission and vision are in the title. I knew we’d change it at the right time, and was excited when the right name for this season finally came to the surface. As a bonus, the name rhymes in both English and Spanish.
  • Receiving dreams not just about Seattle, but about strategy and the right identity for the Church in the Pacific Northwest. Excited for an expanse in my capacity to receive strategies for larger portions of land.
  • Seeing a higher banner being raised over the prophetic movement for healthier standards and culture in groups I participate in. As God raises the banner high, he is making clear to the people that we are people and he is God, so that the people of the nations will learn how to receive. Excited for how greater humility will cause an increase of grace to flow to ministries who have taken the low place. Looking forward to seeing God’s manifest glory as Jesus is lifted high.
  • Using present circumstances in my personal life as intercession training for Seattle, warring over the land, and declaring specific truths about the new house God is building here.
    • It’s weird. This journey in Seattle has made me both more aware of the people’s legitimate wickedness and the reality of God’s wrath while making me more compassionate and in solidarity with their weaknesses. I’m aware that the people have needed and still need Delivers who will stand in the gap and war over the land/people vs. condemning them for their sins. Despite pride, so many individuals legitimately have no awareness of the effect of their choices. Furthermore, the decades of witchcraft and false identity spoken over this region have made it difficult for many to perceive the difference between light and darkness. The region and residents need to be healed and restored. Even as my awareness of the extent of the sin grows, my heart is asking God, “What about the people?”
  • The scent of honey in various places in the city as I’m out walking
  • As my capacity grows, learning how to release aspects of the character of God into a room and bind up the excess demonic chatter
  • Understanding that discipline in the Kingdom of God equates to deep engagement
  • Having more pieces of the puzzle as I consider what adults, college students, and teens in this region will need to receive more of God. Clarity falling into place organically rather than through struggle.
  • Buying a plane ticket abroad for next September and saving my Christmas money to renew my passport

Worship

Names of God

“Jesus, the Sun who Rises at Full Strength”

“The Spirit himself testifies with our spirit that we are God’s children. 17 Now if we are children, then we are heirs—heirs of God and co-heirs with Christ, if indeed we share in his sufferings in order that we may also share in his glory.”

Romans 8:16-17

Worship Music

Verses

 The Lord will make you the head, not the tail. If you pay attention to the commands of the Lord your God that I give you this day and carefully follow them, you will always be at the top, never at the bottom. 

Deuteronomy 28:13

Media

Books

“The Congregation in a Secular Age” by Andrew Root

“Carrying children, then, molds and shapes the congregation into a community that is positioned to see and experience the revelation of Jess Christ, who comes into the world as a child. And this child, who is in the world as the world’s very salvation, who is the resurrection and the life, is indivisibly the  child who needs to be carried by his mother.”

Ch 16

“The Humanity of God” by Karl Barth

“Classical humanism, however, thought it could afford to ignore both the accusation [of sin] and the condemnation. It remains to be seen whether a new humanism will ignore them.”

“The word of God is true before we know it to be true.”

“What is man under the sovereingty of the word of God?  No abstractions now, please! No absolute claims for any self-made, independent, human understanding of the self! No anthropology isolated from Christology.”

p7, 19, and 21

Movies

The King’s Daughter

The subtle themes of dignity, faith, fantasy, and familial love in this movie combined with the cinematography, graphics, and characters exceeded my expectations. It has a little bit of everything! The main message of the film is that created beings deserve dignity and choice. Ultimately, the themes embedded in the plotline indirectly promoted Christian values of stewardship and created worth.

Prayer Requests

  • Grace to use present circumstances as intercession training for Seattle rather than getting caught in interpersonal conflicts (2 Timothy 2:4). To glide and have ease in the Spirit, calling the waters to part with authority (Deut 28:13).
  • To receive the full measure of what God has for me from the United States and the UK both now and in the next few years. To partner more effectively with God in the receiving process without getting distracted by future timings and regions. Integration to have deep roots and remain fully present here even as intercede for and develop a community of nations.
  • At the right time, for God to bring me to a community where I can be shaped again for National Prophecy with leaders who embody the renewed, healthy standards he is raising. Apostolic Leaders who
    • 1) Are experienced in National Prophecy and tangibly healthy
    • 2) also have a heart for the Global South,
    • 3) are interested in building up the Church in key regions using five-fold ministry, and
    • 4) want to actively do regional missions rather than just speak or write words of prophecy.
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