In March, I moved, finished chapter 1 of my thesis, received a lot of material support, and rested. I yielded to God’s timings with the moving timeline and waited for him to shift things.
My experience of Lent and the Resurrection this year felt continuous and fluid rather than the discrete daily celebrations of Holy Week. I was surprised by how quickly I fell back into my rhythm after moving. I’m still appreciating the mystery of how God keeps providing.
The Mantle of the Favored Child
This March was full of palpable momentum. There was such a clear sense of “we are steering in a new direction”.
The night leading into Easter Sunday (3/31), the Lord gave me a dream that honored the journey we’ve taken together over the last 5 years. He acknowledged the lifestyle of dependence that has been teaching me and honored my yieldedness. Once again, he rearticulated the identity of a “Favored Child” he gave me in 2022. At that time, we went traveling together to see places he would have me establish ministry partnerships in later. Before I had done anything, it was important to him for me just to receive.
At the end of the dream, he promised that because I had chosen dependence, this identity would become a new mantle for others to internalize through me. Both children and adults would receive disproportionate, even offensive favor as a result of their yieldedness and intimacy with God.
As I woke up, I had some big questions. I recognized that this mantle related to material provision, and wanted to make sure that there was no hint of prosperity gospel in how I interpreted it. I asked God to show me how it related to scripture. He led me to Matthew 3:17 and how God spoke favor and blessing over Jesus’s life and ministry. I also remembered Matthew 17:27, of how Jesus pulled a coin from the mouth of a fish to pay his tax and Peter’s. From this place of greater provision certainty, I’ve been starting to think about who I would like to see recompensed. In prayer, I’m starting to try to leverage that favor in the direction of the people I care about. When I pray for specific people and situations, it feels like warmth or fire at the center of my chest, and emotive intercession that flows from a place of deep solidarity.
Learning How to Receive
By the time I had this dream, the Lord had been pouring out blessings all month. People donated their time and energy to help me move. From strangers, I received an air conditioner, a TV, a printer, a step, stool, and a car. I ultimately gave the car back because I sensed it wasn’t the right vehicle, but I was so touched that my friends remembered me. On social media, I was chosen by random number generators to receive these items. Since it was a lottery, his blessing over me steered the results in my favor, like the story of Jacob’s wealth growing through the spotted sheep in Genesis 30. The favor on me to receive these gifts started to become so frequent that it became a testimony to my friends at work about the goodness of God.
If that were not enough, there was blessing enough to go around! We found out several days ago that every worker at our retail company except the highest managers would receive a salary increase of $2/hr. While it may not seem significant to some, this change is enormous for hourly employees who are just scraping by. According to my boss, no one saw it coming, not even the regional manager. We were all rejoicing like children!
I’m beyond thrilled that my friends and I get to receive together! It’s so much more fun as a team.
Celebration and Rest
At the time God started doing these provision miracles, he had brought me into a ridiculous place of peace. Moving into a studio again gave me the room I needed for the right boundaries and rest. As these things have happened, it hasn’t been a surprise, but more of a celebration. I have known all along that at some point, the favor I’ve experienced from him over the last year would hit a point where it became much more visible. As he begins to send some early acceleration, I want to have as much time and space to worship in private. I want to preserve the depth of the relationship I have with him and don’t want the appearance of success to get in the way. I already knew that he had covenanted to me, and was committed to supporting me, growing me, and helping me get to the places we need to go. Now that others are starting to realize that, I still want privacy and space to focus on him. The challenge of the moment is saving that space for him alone as more opportunities and people get added to the mix…Both the volume and complexity of my responsibilities are rising. The only way forward is with Jesus.
General Monthly Rhythms of Responding to God
I write these Monthly Summaries because I want to track how I’ve grown with God. The practice of summarizing the many ways he moves each month engages my heart to worship and gives me simple ways to synthesize everything that happened to friends. I’ve written these summaries since October 2019! Since that time, a pattern has emerged in the shape of my process each month.
- Week 1: Detecting and processing fresh grace for new ways God wants to send growth, breakthrough, or healing that month
- Weeks 2-3: Doing the majority of the internal work, productive wrestling, and deep engagement
- Week 4: Noticing that some things have really changed since the beginning of the month, recognizing questions I still have, and next pieces that feel confusing
This pattern holds true and allows me to close out each month well. It’s become an “internal work” exercise regime. It’s my responsibility to reflect on what God is doing in and around me each month. It’s my personality and specific design to store those things in detail. It’s my challenge to synthesize and connect everything in a way that helps others receive my story as an invitation for them to participate in the larger story of what he’s doing locally, regionally, and globally in this season.
Worship
Music
Early March – Psalm 27, Jonathan Ogden
Middle March – Freedom, Jesus Culture
End of March – You can Just Rest, Jenn Johnson
Verses
- Psalm 72, thinking about the theme of nobility who use their power well
- Psalm 27, remembering his specific promises to me
Names of God
Each month, I give God a name that aligns with scripture and how he revealed himself to me that month. This month, I spent the majority of time knowing him as,
- “God who Remembers”
Media
This month kept me too busy for most movies and books! Instead, made an active effort to adapt to the pace of life, spending more of my free time outside and sitting quietly.
Prayer Requests
- To not lose intimacy with God as the pace of life picks up and the blessings become more obvious
- To remain in his timings when it comes to career and school, building momentum for writing by doing the next right thing at a time
- The capacity to engage even more deeply in my thesis and the grace to adapt to the degree of challenge this process requires
Age of the Unexpected 